New Year...but probably still an old you.

WTF 2016??! That came up way too freaking fast right? Is that just me? I am super excited for this New Year. I have a real good feeling that it’s going to treat me well – and if it isn’t – I will MAKE it treat me well since life ain’t perfect. Everybody has their own way of setting goals for the New Year. We all do, even you stubborn mules who say you hate resolutions. Yes, I’m pointing to you hipster with thick glasses sitting in the corner rolling their eyes. We all, even in a minuscule way, have a tiny list of shit we want to do for this clean slate that’s approaching. Isn’t it weird how we think just because a new month is on its way that we have all of these new opportunities? Like we couldn’t try three months ago but now it’s the right time for “x”, “y” and “z”. To tell you the truth, it’s never the perfect time for anything, except maybe drinking. It’s always the perfect time for a well-crafted cocktail. I do think this year will be wonderful though. I lump myself into that group of people that for the last couple of weeks, I just haven’t been trying at anything. I’ve been horribly procrastinating everything in sight and slapping the label “n3w y3@r, n3w m3” on it to justify putting it off. This year, I have goals though! I don’t care how cliché it is – it’s true. My list is going to get completed and STAY completed. Let me parade my dumb list in your face: (Because my goals are probably similar to yours, because we are all human which means we are all the same in most ways)

Enjoy life - this sounds so easy right? This actually segways into a few points I was going to list on their own, but I feel like they can be lumped into this simple expression. I need to stop sweating the small stuff. I need to focus on just my happiness since that's the foundation of any other joy I have in my life. I need to say, "Yes" to new opportunities and make time to travel, indulge in spontaneous activities, and treat myself! I'm still in school, over a quarter of the way complete (HOORAY!). When I was younger, a lot of my focus was on GPA's - numbers. As much as school is important, trust me I know that, the numbers really don't mean crap in the job field for lots of careers. Not one interview I have been on in the past five years has cared that I was a certain rank in class, maintained a 4.0 GPA , or was involved in 25+ clubs. I literally wasted so much energy on getting straight A's, and the only person that it solely mattered to was me. Honestly, being 24 now with other responsibilities and a slew of health problems, the number isn't the most imperative thing to me anymore. Just earning the degree is the accomplishment! I have my future lined up, and I can say wholeheartedly the field I am throwing myself into does not look at numbers - just the piece of paper that said I finished - even if it was a half assed, procrastinated-filled completion. I did it and that's the milestone. So, as much as education is important to me and I will complete my Bachelors, I won't let it stop me from LIVING life, ya know? That's just one example of things that kinda matter but don't matter in life. I will finish, and I will be proud, but I won't let school envelope my life to the point where I don't spend time with those I love, stress to the point of getting sick, or miss out on opportunities that will really impact me such as traveling. The schooling example can be replaced with a job you are at only at to pay bills. I'm at a job that is paying the bills right now, but there is no way that after I clock out each day that I will bring my worries to my personal life. I work hard, don't get me wrong, but this isn't my lifelong career or passion - so I am grateful and all - but I will travel when I want, celebrate holidays and fun things with my loved ones, and still make time for me. I will ENJOY life, not just go through the motions. 

BALANCE the enjoyment. I won't overindulge in relaxation and me time because as we all are aware, anything can get overwhelming in huge increments without pauses. Too much cheese, as much we all are fond of various cheeses (oh bleu, feta, and pepper jack I am thinking of you), if not spaced out and portioned - leaves you constipated, feeling regret, and probably getting sick. Who wants that? My goal for the rest of my life, not just 2016, is to reach a perfect balance of school, work, fitness, leisure and saving money because #adulting. For me, I will accomplish this with a mixture of my Daily Planner and the reminders/calendar on my phone. At work, I force myself to take breaks with reminders on my phone that I religiously follow when they go off. I walk away from my stress cubicle and have a 15 minute personal block of time - and that truly helps with my weekly grind. My Daily Planner is broken up into literally every aspect of my life: parties, shows, work schedule, homework, bills, moving money to savings, goals for the day, ect. I write out everything so I can have that balance we crave so we don't become koalas that sleep over 20 hours a day but we also don't become that workaholic who develops depression, bitterness and resent towards almost everything. Find a way for you to balance your daily activities since I know this is a goal on a lot of people's resolution list. Keep that scale balanced!

Do what you love, within reason. My goal outside of helping B run his rehab, is becoming a full time blogger / internet person / what have you. As much as I would LOVE to update my page everyday and fully indulge myself in kenNERDdy - that would mean living on the street right now because I”d have to quit my job to do that. My 9-5 pays my bills, blogging doesn’t. So until I can pay my bills through blogging, I need to be logical with #adultlife. In order to keep my balance (remember my goal!? Yay wrap-ups - and spinach tortilla wraps), I can only blog about once a week right now. I love it and it makes me happy, so I make it crucial to incorporate it into the daily grind just like my gaming, reading, listening to music and my other stupid hobbies. I can’t wait to be a full time blogger - hopefully soon - but until then I have to take care of myself, right? Anyway, if you really love something and want to bring your passion into reality, pursue it until that happens by any means. In my situation, I am my only support when it comes to making sure I can pay my bills, so right now I can’t just focus on blogging. But, if you can live with someone for free and only need to work a part time job in order to give something your full attention - GO FOR IT! Just please be logical! 

CELEBRATE the little victories, because let's face it - a majority of your list is not going to happen. I'm not saying your list can't be completed but let's be realistic. A lot of people I know have things along the lines of,  "get super ripped at the gym in the next month", "get a 4.0 GPA while going to school full time while raising my 3 kids and working 2 jobs", or even just "find true love". Those are not real goals everybody! It's great to set them, of course, but when January rolls around we get in this weird state of mind that the New Year will allow us to enter a new dimension where we can change the unchangeable circumstances most adults are in. If you are a single parent with three children and working two jobs to pay the bills - it would be pretty hard to go to school full time AND maintain a 4.0 GPA. Why not set goals you KNOW you can accomplish? Amend that goal to something like, "Get enrolled in school and PASS!" - that's doable for someone in that situation 9/10 times. If you can raise three kids by yourself (and do it successfully - like by feeding them and spending time with them and other parent shit), maintain two jobs AND get a 4.0 GPA - please tell me what drugs you’re taking. I can barely maintain a 4.0 GPA and I only have three cats... Anyway, hopefully you get what I'm saying. Set realistic goals if you are going to write the dreaded New Years Resolutions List. Remember to treat yourself though for little victories throughout the year. If you get lost in tremendous resolutions for a year straight, you will hate yourself more then yo do right now because you're thinking of all the stuff you DIDN'T complete on your list from 2015. That's not the right way to live, dummy. (Yeah, you BETTER picture Dennis from 30 Rock saying that.) How about before you focus on your new list for 2016 and sulk in the sadness of what you were not able to accomplish in 2015…..write a list prior of what you’re happy / proud of from 2015! Build yourself up, because to an extent, (let’s not live in unicorn land right now) you can do whatever you truly want to. If you DON’T want to do the work to get a six pack on your abs because deep down you only want a six pack of Mike’s HardER Black Cherry Lemonade….why wallow over that? Be happy! Yeah, go for your walks/jogs/ light gym session to stay healthy, but don’t go Nazi over a goal. I have an all or nothing addictive personality, so I know how very difficult it is to not beat yourself up over changing horrible habits. Lifestyle changes take a lot of time though, not just a year. If you want to get fit, remember it won’t happen in 3 weeks and you won’t be able to just cut cold turkey smoking, drinking, ect. That’s pretty impossible and not worth stressing about. Go to the gym a few times a week and slowly make changes - nobody is timing you and you will probably be successful if you realize that your list can’t be completed in two seconds. I now wanted to take a moment and celebrate MY victories from this year:

Learning to stand up for myself and not take bullshit: from getting charged $1 more at 7/11 to leaving a job that I truly despised to cutting out toxic friends that I’ve known for a long time - I’ve gotten a lot better at not taking any form of things I don’t deserve. We are all allowed to have feelings, and if they get hurt - we are perfectly entitled to do what we feel necessary to become happy. A huge lesson I learned in 2015 is that friendships aren’t always measured by how long you have known somebody. Sometimes, a really amazing bestie can pop into your life instantly and make you realize that someone you’ve known for years is a POS that you don’t have time for. I am not a doormat anymore and it’s a wonderful, liberating light of confidence. I hope everyone, at some point in their life, can cut out a friend that sucks you dry even though it’s really hard because you’vemade so many memories and DID indeed have good times, but now you are the only one pumping effort into the friendship and are being taken advantage of- so it’s time to slice that tumor off. I bet you can think of at least one person in your life like this. If you did, maybe you should rethink what you deserve because more times then not - your group of trusted, truly decent friends could probably be smaller. 

So, before you go worrying about what a sack of dicksyou are because you didn’t eat your broccoli everyday this past year, take pride in the strides you took for the better. Or just the fun times - like when you got blackout drunk and fell into some shrubbery after a rousing game of bowling. That’s a win in my book. (Really, that was me winning last year.) I guess what I am saying is don’t take your resolutions too seriously. At ANY point in the year, if you REALLY want to change something in your life, you will do it. It doesn’t take a list in January for you to get 100 new things done. It’s all in your mindset. Focus on the positive, follow your gut, and just go with the flow ma peeps! Thanks so much reading and remember to #staynerdy. Share your 2016 Goals and how you will keep them. Don’t overwhelm yourselves and don’t forget we are human so mistakes are OKAY along the way. See you next week! 

PURCHASE OF THE WEEK

I finally bought myself a PSP. I've wanted one since Sony first started producing these bad boys.I love my Playstation so bringing it on the go is awesome - AND this Aqua Blue is so pretty! It pains me to say this, but this is definitely the best handheld on the market - SOWWIE 3DS XL, I still love you though. 

I finally bought myself a PSP. I've wanted one since Sony first started producing these bad boys.I love my Playstation so bringing it on the go is awesome - AND this Aqua Blue is so pretty! It pains me to say this, but this is definitely the best handheld on the market - SOWWIE 3DS XL, I still love you though. 

CLASSIC GAME OF THE WEEK

To go along with my new Aqua Blue buddy, what else would my first purchase in the PSN store be but the Spyro trilogy!? This purple cutie made up my core being so I'm having a blast reliving it. I haven't been able to play in YEARS so I am just screeching with joy. If you have no idea what or who I'm talking about - EW. Please download an emulator and give it a try. It'll change your entire being. 

To go along with my new Aqua Blue buddy, what else would my first purchase in the PSN store be but the Spyro trilogy!? This purple cutie made up my core being so I'm having a blast reliving it. I haven't been able to play in YEARS so I am just screeching with joy. If you have no idea what or who I'm talking about - EW. Please download an emulator and give it a try. It'll change your entire being. 

VLOG OF THE WEEK!

YO this girl, Lor, is awesome! I've been watching her videos for a long while and think you should indulge in her bright colored, dark soul, sweet power. Her latest video incorporates Halloween during the Holiday season - and that's reason enough to watch.